A Spice of Life w/ Suga: Q & A Session 18

otherwomanQ: Dear Suga,

Why would a woman stay with a man she knows is in love with another woman?


A woman needing understanding

A: Dear A woman needing understanding,

That’s a tough one seeing how I’ve never been in that situation but I’ll take a stab at it. I look at the fact that women stay with men through any situation for all sorts of reasons, whether others understand it or not. She could have low self-esteem and not yet know that she worth having someone that loves only her. There’s nothing you can really do to help that, it’s something she must learn on her own. She also may think that if she proves how much she loves him he’ll being to fall more in love with her. The best thing you can honestly do for her is just be supportive. Either she’ll decide to leave him or not.

sb10064862af-001Q. Dear Suga,

I mentioned to my husband that I wanted to spice up our love life. I regret even saying that to him. He now wants to have a threesome and even has a woman in mind. That was not what I had in mind to spice things up; I wanted to have sex in different places other than at home. I don’t know what to do now because it’s all he talks about now. I’m also concerned that he already has someone in mind. What do I do?


Not down for the threesome

A. Dear Not down for the threesome,

I feel when you told him you wanted to spice things up you should have directly went in what specifically you meant. You let this idea marinate in his mind and that’s where it landed. Truthfully, I don’t know many men whose mind wouldn’t have went there. The fact that you still haven’t said anything makes this totally your fault. I will say this though; I am concerned about the fact that he has a woman in mind. That means there is a woman that he is attracted to and it may be mutual. I wouldn’t trust that. I feel that if a woman has the idea for a threesome she should choose. It just saves us from wondering what our men are up to when we’re not around. You need to sit him down immediately and explain what you meant and hopefully he’ll be down for that and let go of the idea of a threesome. He probably will still try to convince you to have the threesome but that’s another story and something you have to decide on.

Good Luck!


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