Spice of Life w/Suga Q&A Session 14

Dear Suga,
I love my boyfriend but I’m starting to notice that he drinks an awful lot. From morning til night he’s drinking. I even discovered that he drinks at work as well. I’m afraid that he has a real problem. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Worried Girlfriend

Dear Worried Girlfriend,
I can completely understand the fear. Though we sometimes joke with people about being an alcoholic, it is a very real disease. Now sitting down and talking to him about is best but the problem is that most people that drink a lot will never admit that they have a problem. There will be excuses to why he drinks. He may say it’s how he winds down after work. He may also say that he only drinks when he’s with his friends but if he’s with his friends all the time then there lies one of the problems. A lot of people who drink are around other people who drink all the time. They don’t see it as a problem because they’re not the only ones doing it. My huge concern is the fact that he’s drinking at work. That is reckless behavior that can cost him his job. Doing something that he knowingly can affect his livelihood is cause for concern. Try talking to him if he doesn’t see it as a problem you then have to decide if this is something you can live with or not. Make the best decision for you because things may only get worse if he continues down this path.

 

 

Dear Suga,
I love my girlfriend very much but she is lazy as hell. She doesn’t want to work but she doesn’t want to keep the house up either. I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Breadwinner

Dear Breadwinner,
I’m sorry you’re having this problem. In relationships everyone should be playing their position. If you two have decided that she’s not going to work then she must take care of the house. It’s only right. That takes the burden off you of having to come home and cook or clean after a long day. Now if she doesn’t want to be home all the time then suggest that she get a part time job and use the other time taking care of home. Either way she has to do something. Sitting at home and doing nothing is not an option. You will begin to resent her and the relationship will suffer. You must let her know that you are in a partnership and you need her help in order to make it work. If you both are working than you both do chores. Granted, you helping out too would be appreciated as well. Though you work you make a mess too and cleaning up after yourself may show her that you are willing to help. That could be the motivation she needs to get up and clean as well. Sit down and have a talk about who is doing what, that way whatever you two should be doing will clearly be understood.

 

If there is a question you need an answer to, drop a line to Suga at spicewitsuga@gmail.com and tell her what you need help with!

spice of life

 

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